This year in a nutshell

this was the best year of my life, no joke. it had its lows, like right now, but it was still an amazing year. I met someone and discovered a new feeling; Love. I started a clothing brand, that im eager to watch blossom. I met hella good friends, and lost others. I'm just giddy with excitement, to see what happens in the coming year. I just sucks that the year ends on a "eh" note. But im willing to give it another shot, starting 3 hours from now. I loved this year. I love mhs, i love my freinds, and my life in general. Im so ready for a new year.

Now that your gone

No names here, just the way i feel. you asked me if i really did love you. I honesty don't know what love is. Love is for grown folks. No clue, lost, ask an old lady like your mom. But if i had to choose someone right now, to spend the rest of my life with, you'd be on top. Your amazing, in your selfless nature, your soft smooth skin, your white clear cuticles, Your perfect teeth; that i hear you brushing relentlessly every night (longer than ive talked to some people). I love the way i can hold you and feel like nohting feels better than to be in your embrace. Your my everything. I dont care what everyone of your frieds are saying. YOU know the truth, you know whats good. You know what im about. I just hope that this whole thing works out. Im sure that not talking is hard on you, but its not easy on me. I didint want to stop. But thats what needs to happen. Im sorry for everything ive done. Find it in yourself to forgive me and give me another chance.

A new start

First post in a long time. Havent felt the need to vent untill now. I hate my family life. Its such bullshit. My dad doesent understand that im not a robot and that i have emotions. To my mom i am just a dissapointment. But thats not what really gets to me. My sister. I loathe her. Shes the biggest waste of my time there is. People say, "oh its not so bad" well believe me, live with her for a day and then tell me that. Shes just a menice that no one wants around. Always looking for conflict, a problem, and attention im SICK of it. Your not showing anyone anything. Your not impressing anyone. Im tired of crying for you to get better. Im sick of living with a liar. Im tired of you feeling as if we are a "bad family" when its YOUR fault. Every problem we've ever had, YOU are linked directly to it. Fuck you, you selfish stupid bitch. i cant wait till you move out. Im sick of you making mom cry. You silly stupid fuck. Grow up.

You give me stomach ulcers

Why do you do this? SERIOUSLY! every girl i have the slightest interest in. You go and get all cuddly cozy with them. At first i though it was just a bizarre coincidence, but it cant be. EVERY TIME. I just hope you realize what your doing to me. you selfish bastard, fuck you. I dont want your bullshit anymore.

Waste of time

My day started by trying to forget yesterday. The first high school dance i went to, and not such a good impression. Pictures were ok, but idk my date looked like she had no desire to be around me, except on slow songs(and even then). And i tried to dance with her, but she just turned around and looked at me. So what was i to think? I didint want to keep going up to her and pestering her. But the shit of it is, a little after i tried to dance with her, she dances with one of my friends! So i don't get it. I guess i fail. It was kinda doomed from the beginning. I knew it was going to be sucky. I wish that i got to know her first. Im sorry i was such a bad date. I wish i asked you, i wish that we talked, i wish we danced, i wish i could have shown you a better time.


But DENNYS however was the shit. So yin yang, good and bad; all that jazz. But yeah Fuck yesterday.

Even though

I've gotten what i want, why do i feel like i dont? I want to have a good time. Seems like we wont.

Homecomming

Homecomming is comming up. I dont know if im going. No date as of right now. I really really want to go. It would be my first School dance EVER! I dont know, i just want to have a good time you know? Whatever, soccer tommorow.

Your cool

Nigga, do you even KNOW me? assumptions much. Sure, i guess i could have handled it diffrent, but what the hell. So my bad i guess. IDC. I aint trippin over that shit. I miss last year. Fuck sophmore.

Bullshit

10 minutes of play today? really? it took me 40 minutes to drive there, and i play 10 minutes? if you say so.

A Untimely update

Hello bloggers. I havent been on this stuff for the longest of time. Gets old quick. Well hella stuff has already happened this year. So school sucks pretty hard. I dont like most of my classes, and i cant do anything about it now that its too late into the year. I actually care this year. Jesus, the words of my parents haunt me still. "Where are you going with your life?" To be honest, i have no clue. I like to cook. I want to become a chef. I want to serve in the Air Force. I want to play soccer for college. Too many wants, not enough effot. Oh well.

Soccer is in full swing now. I like playing for Fusion FC, but i have more potential than that. I like the feeling of seeing the same coach since 1st grade. If i had to chose the smartest man in the world, Marc Bunyard would be my choice. He is my idol. Now should i turn my back on my idol of 8 years? SCSC has me signed, but i can still bail. I REALLY want to play. But i also want to stay with FC fusion. :|

On a brighter note

Soccer today. :D

you know what?

Ive realized that your not a friend. Your one of those nice to everyone people. Thats all good and fine, but your not even your own person anymore. I'm not going to keep telling myself, "oh shes just too busy to talk to you. were still cool". fuck that. When i first met you, you were hella chill. Now your just bullshit and flake on EVERYTHING. Do you realize everytime you told me you'd come see me, or watch me play soccer you never showed? And i just forcefed more of your bullshit and made me think you were still a good friend. You befrend eveyone to the point were they think your there bestfreind. Your ignoring your own life/needs and living through his. Your not a friend. to me at least. I dont give a fuck anymore.

chill the fuck out

seriously, smile God loves you.

Registration

So yesterday was registration. I started by meeting up Brian Nguyen at starbucks. He told me about Nudies jeans, and we talked about what classes we might be taking. We made our way to MHS and we sat with JT Merrick Branden Jeffery and some others. I havent seen them in a long ass time, and it was good to start laughing with those cats again. Well, nobody was kind enough to tell me we needed a ticket, to about half an hour later, i make my way to Big Black and i get a ticket. 334390 somthing. IT WAS 100 DIDGETS FROM EVERYONE ELES! but whatever. As i was walking back, I saw angelica and gave her a big ass hug. Ive never hugged her before! She usually just calls me fat head. I sat with Kevin C. and Ashley for a while. After all the waiting, we were going through the line to turn fourms in. The dude that was assigning lockers though my name was Timm Ah. What am i, a taliban terriost? Tim Ah? Dumbfuck. OH! im the only person who had a backpack on for the ID picture! Thats cool man! but yeah it was good to see everyone again. Fimilar faces, and lots of new ones. i dont know half of our class.




i stayed up till 6 this moring, im tired as fuck. But alas, no sleep. I need to find some raw denim Levis 511-501 :|
Not and easy task youu know?


I want the nujabes CD! idk where to buy it. asdfghjkl


i'll end it here.

BTW birthday is soon.

First time blogger!

Well, here we are. Myspace is boring, and i havent really ever blog before so why not? Blogging isint one of my fortes so this is more of my own thing then for anyone else.

So recently, i went on a cruise to Mexico. It was the best experience Ive had on a vacation. Seriously, the people there were hella chill. One of the best parts was the food. Oh my god. I learned so much from 5 days floating in international waters. I did so much.it was a Parasailing, basketbal playing, flea market shopping, taco eating fiesta. There was a "cool" teens club that i met some hella cool kids at. I really hope that we get together and do that shit again. There's nothing like it. Im'a miss that shit like crazy. :|

Final summer plans?
+sky dive?
+party?
+Go to my cousins?
+joyride?

ANOTHER THING!

Im hella happy for school, seriously. School is the BIGGEST time killer. But that shits bittersweet. Im sure in a week or two, im goning to be complaining on when schools over. But whatever.

Goals for 09';
+stop saying "gay"
+commit to school
+focus on soccer
+drink more water
+meet a legit homeboy
+learn uke
+Talk to old friends more
+Talk to the cruise people often
+obtain a nikon d40
+Get my permit
+lose 10 pounds


Thats all for now. 4:17 am